Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Checking in and letting go......

I'm still around.  Reading your blogs.  Practicing yoga.  My challenge?  Well, I did 24 classes in 27 days.  I have no excuses for not making 30.  I could have made 30.  All of the things that have been blocking me from completing challenges are still there.  The thing is, they are inside of me.  I can't seem to figure out how to get out of my own way lately.  I feel a bit lost, a bit adrift.  So when you are a tiny boat being tossed around the giant waves of your own making, what do you do?  You go deep.  Dive down....deep, deep, deep, until you are laying on the bottom in the peaceful stillness, far away from the waves.  The only place I know where to do that is yoga.  So I keep dragging my mat back into the studio.

Tonight was an amazing practice with Dray leading us.  I had two girls to the right of me and one to the left  that were all very strong in their practices.  I noticed, during standing head to knee we all kicked out and looked like steady upside down letter L's, breathing in sync, waiting for the instruction to bring our elbows down.  It was beautiful.  I felt connected to those three women in that moment.  It was an incredible feeling.
Recently I stumbled across a poem that I am IN LOVE with.  I want to share it with you.

She let go.

"She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.

She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the 'right' reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn't ask anyone for advice. She didn't read a book on how to let go... She didn't search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.

She didn't promise to let go. She didn't journal about it. She didn't write the projected date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn't check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.

She didn't analyze whether she should let go. She didn't call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn't do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn't call the prayer line. She didn't utter one word. She just let go.

No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn't good and it wasn't bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.

In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore."
- Ernest Holmes


  1. Wonderful poem indeed. And so very true, in so very many ways.

    I say forget challenges, Michelle. Just do your yoga. And what will need to happen will happen, in its own good time.

  2. Wow. A beautiful image from class, you synchronized upside-down-L-like-Lindas. And this is an amazing poem. Thanks so much for blogging, I really love your words (and the ones you share).

  3. Was searching for Bikram blogs and you were top of list. Wonderful words. Peace.

  4. I've been seeking out Bikram blogs and yours keeps popping up. Must be worth reading!

    I love that poem. I think Ernest wrote it thinking of me and what I should do with myself if I knew what was good for me.

  5. That poem was exactly what I needed to read right now in this very moment in time. Thank you.


  6. Hi I chanced upon ur blog accidentally but I must say I loved what I read. I went through ur entire yoga journey. I must say its commandable. I just started Bikram yoga again about 2 weeks back and I have almost reduced 10lbs but what is really troubling me is my body composition analysis. My fat% is not dropping but all I have lost is muscle mass which doesn't sound good to me. What's your take on this? Even I have attended few of Brandy's classes n must say she is amazing...yogini from India Bombay

  7. This is such a lovely post! Thanks for the inspiration and the imagery.

    A big Friday NAMASTE to you :)

    -Rachel @ alive in the fire

  8. Hi Ana~ Well, I'm surprised you are losing muscle mass...perhaps there is something you need to adjust with your eating...more protein maybe?

  9. Hello!
    I post a blog that isn't really well read but I would still like to post that lovely poem? I think oftentimes my blog is as much a journal.