The title of this post is me quoting something Dray said during practice today and I'm pretty sure he was quoting Bikram, or at least somebody at training. He said it during fixed firm. Good timing as that one gets a lot of people to go "oh hell no!" when they are new. Something about the position of the ankles feet and knees sends some of these grown men screaming for the door (figuratively of course).
Sometime during the floor series I had one of those random thoughts that are sort of like a mini epiphany float up and grab me. It said "its not about you and Bill anymore, now its just about you. You and your issues". It was this strange little random thought out of nowhere that felt like, well, it felt like closure. The breakup pain has really started to be less and less frequent and less intense and I've really been thinking about the fact that I have space. Space to focus on me and my daughter and for once in my life not worry about men. Its not like I've had a ton of relationships, but I feel like I've spent the last 17 years either in a relationship, recovering from one or trying to start one. For once I'm not just "in between" relationships. I'm just here....in this spaciousness that has come into my life and its starting to feel comfortable.
I'll have another order of paincakes please Dray! Serve 'em up, I like 'em!