Sunday, July 27, 2008

Day 57: Triple Play

I didn't think I'd do it.  Doubles three days in a row that is.  But I did.  I really surprised myself.  Today was 3:30 with Oksana (a blessedly smooooooth class....thank you Oksana) and 5:30 with Frank (understanding, funny, compassionate Frank....thank you Frank!).  I don't think I would've made it today with different teachers.  I was feeling fragile and scared going into this day.  I was starting to feel tired....mentally not physically.  Interesting, because my ultimate goal is to go to teacher training one day....and they do doubles every day.   I think there is a difference though.  A difference between focusing on nothing but the training and doing what you need to do and trying to work full time and be a single mom and pull doubles.  A big difference.  I feel proud of myself though.  Really proud.  I'm almost glad I missed those classes (almost) because it made me really have to dig deep and find out just how important this challenge was to ME.  Yes, I'm raising money for George, yes my friends and family all know I'm doing it, but in the end, I had to do this for me.  That's the only reason I made it today.  By the end of the first class, I had myself totally talked out of the second class today. I was going to leave.  This conversation took place in my head during the floor series.  When push came to shove, and I was laying in final savasana in the first class, a peaceful calm came over me and I said "you have another yoga outfit and your waters and you are already here, and your daughter is at her fathers, you have no other commitments today....stay".  And I did.  Even though I did not want to.  I usually just do what I want, so to have another part of me taking over and doing whats best for me in spite of me, well that was new.  I felt like a new inner strength was born.  Incredible.  I owe this all to Bikram yoga.  I will become a teacher one day, I will spread this yoga love to others.  It makes me so very happy.  
One more thing:  I am closer to "the wrap" in eagle than I have ever calves are right on each other but I can't quite get my toe behind the calf.  I am close though.  I am also kicking out in standing head to knee every day with a solid locked standing knee.  No, I don't stay in it very long, but I am working on all the right things....sucking my stomach in, flexing my foot towards my face, trying to get that stretch in my achilles tendon....I'm "getting" it.  Standing, I've made the most progress there.  I will sound a bit like bragging here, but my standing bow is looking, well, pretty.  Yes, it looks very pretty!  My leg is way over my head, two shoulders in one line and I'm kicking and stretching equal 50/50.  Its amazing how far I've come!

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