Monday, April 6, 2009

Day 71: Faith in my own edict

Well, today was 330 with Connie.  I was done with my pre-conference workshop and was able to get to yoga early.  Today was a test of my faith in my own edict.  I can hear myself now "this yoga fixes everything....if you let it".  "Your (insert body part here) hurts, well just keep going, work through the pain, the yoga will take care of it". 
I have seen the look of disbelief on the face of whoever I'm running my mouth at.  Ya, I get it.  Today I was looking at myself in the mirror, faced contorted in agony due to extreme pain in my left knee thinking "holy shit, are you kidding me Michelle?".  I could not lock that knee for periods longer than 20 seconds which of course affected the standing one legged balancing series.  It also brought tears to my eyes just to bend it and get it in my hand for standing bow.  By the time I got to floor bow, I was crying a little bit.  Breath coming out in jagged gasps, tears stinging my eyes.  It was bad.  Probably the worst pain in a yoga class ever.  I just kept thinking back to my challenge last year where I worked through pain in my right knee.  That pain is now a faded memory, but I'm quite sure it hurt at least almost as bad and I remember pushing through, continuing my challenge and breaking out to the other side, healed and stronger.
So tomorrow I'll go back.  Because how can I walk around saying those things if I won't believe them and listen to them myself?

2 comments:

  1. Ouch. Are you taking it a little gentler with that left knee, though?? I agree---you work through the pain. But, I've also learned that to heal what's hurt, I can't plow through. I have to move oh so slowly and carefully and sometimes only at 50 percent.

    I hope your knee starts feeling better soon!!

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  2. oh my goodness did I ever baby that thing! I'll do the same today...I don't want to make it worse. I'm walking around alot today at my conference and it does not hurt, so we'll see what happens when I have to lock it again tonight in balancing series...

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